Despite the claims of many, younger generations (in fact, all generations) still value fidelity in romantic relationships. Free love, open relationships, friends with benefits, and multiple partner relationships might make for titillating television but they are not what people are looking for in real life.

As an example, testing fidelity is big business, driven by social media sites like TikTok and Instagram. People have started web-driven companies to test relational loyalty through what has been described as a modern version of a “honey trap.” The testers are paid by one person in a relationship (who either suspects their partner of cheating or just wants to test their loyalty) to entice the other person in the relationship to be unfaithful. And, it’s big business. One account has had 3.6 billion views. Another tester has had 557 million. One tester reported doing about ten loyalty tests each day – charging for her services and making a very comfortable living in the process.

What strikes me as most interesting about this is not the business model or practices, but the underlying issue – the desire by people in relationships (mostly women, according to the demographics of the primary users) to have someone who is really committed to them. They want this so much they are willing to pay to have it verified.

God designed relationships to work this way. One man commits to one woman – in marriage, not in some ill-defined domestic partnership. When that design is marred – no matter the reason – it always results in interpersonal conflict and personal emotional damage. Even when one person is clearly victimized and the relational breakdown is understandable, the aftermath is painful and recovery takes time. God designed us for fidelity – genuine, lasting commitment to one person for life. Meeting this standard requires self-sacrifice and self-control – two qualities in short supply today.

Relational selfishness is accentuated by cultural arrogance in defining modern romantic relationships. Influencers strive to convince us that relational fluidity is acceptable, or even desirable. They are lying to us and doing immeasurable damage in the process. Reject these lies. Embrace fidelity in relationships, monogamy in marriage, and durability of commitment to these ideals.

Rhonda Kelley

Dr. Iorg admires the faithful and genuine character of his friend Rhonda Kelly.

Jeff Iorg
President Emeritus
Dr. Jeff Iorg is the president emeritus of Gateway Seminary. Prior to his service at the Seminary, Dr. Iorg was the Executive Director of the Northwest Baptist Convention for almost ten years. He was also the founding pastor of Greater Gresham Baptist Church in Gresham, Oregon, and has served as a pastor in Missouri and a staff pastor in Texas.

Prayer Sparks

Pastor Jon Varner shares what he learned developing a practice of combining his daily Bible reading and prayer.

Jon Varner
Lead Pastor
Jon Varner is the lead pastor at Valley View Christian Church in Kent, Washington.

Sobering

Life is short, heaven is long. Let’s live like it today.

Jeff Iorg
President Emeritus
Dr. Jeff Iorg is the president emeritus of Gateway Seminary. Prior to his service at the Seminary, Dr. Iorg was the Executive Director of the Northwest Baptist Convention for almost ten years. He was also the founding pastor of Greater Gresham Baptist Church in Gresham, Oregon, and has served as a pastor in Missouri and a staff pastor in Texas.